Meaning

“Let me tell you a story…” It is the oldest invitation in human experience. Our stories are an invitation to relationship and thereby an invitation to meaning. To be a person is to have a story to tell. Humans are natural storytellers and we constantly invite story exchanges: How are you doing? What’s up? How can I be of help? What brings you here? (Daniel Taylor: tell me a story: The Life-Shaping power of our Stories)

In some ways our stories contain the illusive answer to the eternal question, “what is the meaning of life”, at least of the storyteller’s life.

BEGINNING

Tell me a story, your story.

But where is the beginning? Where does one start? Why tell it at all?

Our stories are rarely so neatly packaged that they have a clear beginning and ending. In fact, our life stories usually begin before we are born. The narrative spoken about us begins sometimes long before we are even conceived, in the way we are anticipated, spoken of, and named.

Defining moments, those moments that stand out as memorable in which there was an incident, positive or negative, and a consequence, usually contain important and potentially self-defining aspects of our history.

Our stories are often told out of the chronological sequence of events, beginning often in the middle.

HEALING NARRATIVE

Many of us have stories marked by heartbreak or tragedy that hopefully led us to a counselor or other trusted person in whom we could confide. While tragic events in themselves may lead to undesirable consequences for health and wellness, research shows that people who have had a trauma and kept that experience secret were much worse off than those who talked about their experience, placing the silent sufferers at even higher risk for a major or minor illness compared to those who did talk about their traumas. (James W. Pennebaker, Ph.D. in Writing to Heal).

TIME

Our stories are not set in stone. They live and evolve with us, shaped by the winds of time and events, reshaping with new perspective, new information, and accumulated wisdom. We are each the narrator and interpreter of our own story, and have a duty to take charge of the responsibility of self-definition. Our story and our definition should be claimed, not be left to by-standers to project their own story onto us.

EVOLUTIONARY TALE OF BREAKING OUT

Autobiography in Five Short Chapters—Portia Nelson in Panhala Digest Number 2970

Chapter 1

I walk down the street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I fall in.
I am lost…I am helpless.
It isn’t my fault.
It takes forever to find a way out.

Chapter 2

I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I pretend I don’t see it.
I fall in again.
I can’t believe I am in the same place.
But it isn’t my fault.
It still takes a long time to get out.

Chapter 3

I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I see it is there.
I still fall in…it’s a habit.
My eyes are open.
I know where I am.
It is my fault.
I get out immediately.

Chapter 4

I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I walk around it.

Chapter 5

I walk down another street.